Saturday, December 5, 2009

...It's complicated

Fact: Generally speaking,life is very complex.

With that being said, unfortunately that doesn't mean that everyone is equipped to deal with those complexities. You see it all the time. People try to make complex things into something simple when its not. The tactic is most prevalently seen in the adult dealings with children.

Child : Mommy why is it thundering?
Mother : Because God is bowling.

Its very common for people just to assume that children can't comprehend such things so they cop out. As if telling them the truth would destroy their world. It's often funny to me though when I run into children that have more understanding than their adult counterparts.

I remember some years back I decided to cop out on an adult. It was an ex to be exact. I had broken it off with her and then days later she told me that her mother told her that the reason I had broken up with her was because I had fallen out of love with her. She kept repeating it to me over and over again till it made me upset. I told her that her mother was wrong and left it at that. The truth was she made me miserable. In fact in my entire life I had never been as miserable as I was when I was in a relationship with her...and that says a lot because I grew up with a drug addicted mother. She was the highly emotional type throughout our relationship I decided to save her some tears and save my eyes and ears from receiving those tears. I hate hearing and seeing women cry. It fucks with my soul. It doesn't matter if they are wrong and should be crying, I can't stand it. I may have done her a disservice by holding back...or maybe not. Some people can hear the truth... some people can see the truth and still won't be able to deal with it appropriately. Such is life though. And then again, who's to say what is appropriate and what isn't.

I'm a firm believer in the ideal that almost nothing in life is "black or white" (meaning either or). In relationships this type of thinking is often seen

Woman: No you don't love me, because if you loved me you wouldn't treat me like that.
means to love or to be loved, so one can actually have feelings of love toward a person but be completely incompetent relationship-wise. This fact absolutely became clear to me when I was watching of all things The Maury Povich Show. It was a lie detector show and this one lady wanted to see if her husband had been stepping out on her. So Maury had the guy come out as he read the results of the test.

The first question...Does he love his wife?
He answered: Yes...which turned out to be the truth

Unfortunately the following questions...
*Do you find your wife sexually attractive?
*Are you bored with the sex?
*Did you proposition her friend with sex?
*And have you cheated on her since you've been together?
All had negative responses.

I dunno...I'm still unsure if simplification is a good or a bad thing. I want to think that doing the hard work that is thinking "outside the box", getting to know people, doing your own research,and telling people the truth would lead to a better world. Who knows?

I'll end this one with quote a philosopher once said...

"The truth is blade that often bloodies more than it cuts."

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