Sometimes it doesn't pay to be nice to everybody.
So today I woke up, got hit with the bad news wrote a blog about it, then hit back to my room to sleep off some of the gloominess. In the mean time in between time, whenever I'm feeling really down I always try to keep up the visual "I'm ok" look. Mainly because there is nothing worse than a bunch of folks who could really give 2 fucks about you asking you "what's wrong?", or "are you ok?". That shit is for the birds. So I always try to keep up the facade.
So, I'm chilling in my room lights off taking a nap, when out of nowhere the janitor pops in and decides to clean my bathroom. Dude was about as tactful as dynamite fishing. SMH. But I'm trying my best not to sweat it because like I said before...keeping up the facade. Dude sparks up some small talk asking me where I'm from. I tell him (Maryland). I ask him the same. He answers (Michigan his whole life)...Then for some reason this white janitor decides to tell me that he's married to a Philipino woman 30 years his junior (he's 60)...and that they just had a child together that's now 6 months old. He also tells me that he was somewhat disappointed that his child has his skin color and not his wife's...Blah blah blah and some other bullshit that was unauthentic...It's at this time that I say to myself "FUCK!"
I fucking hate it when I'm talking to someone outside my race and they try to fucking pander to me on some race shit. That shit is phoney as shit. Just because you can stick your fucking dick inside another race doesn't make you a civil rights activist asshole. SMH.
But that's not all. After talking that shit...he says "I don't really care about color anyways"...and I think "awesome...end of conversation"...But I'm wrong. This fuck brings up the bible and then proceeds to tell me a very contridictory tale about how he thinks the Bible says that Black people are cursed...Then the fuck follows it up by saying that back in slavery times that many black people betrayed their own by selling them into slavery. He says it in a way that lets you know he thinks in his tiny brain that betrayal is something unique to just black people.
And just when dude finishes up his bullshit tirade and gives me a space to shut him THE FUCK UP, a nurse comes in and gives me some punk ass tests. And he wanders off to who knows where. Leaving me pissed for a number of reasons..
1.I let that fuck tell me to my face that God cursed Black people.
2.I let that fuck tell me to my face that God cursed Black people.
3.I let that fuck tell me to my face that God cursed Black people..and get away with out either (a)Punching the old out of his 60 year old ass (b)Telling him the truth (c)telling him he's an idiot (d)all of the above.
I'm still arguing with myself wondering if I took the high road or punked out. Money is on the line in there somewhere.
What a fucking day this is so far...