Sunday, January 11, 2009

"Nigger Stain" (c) Clayton Bigsby

It dwells in the depths of hell
The worst of all the ghouls and goblins
Yearning for the face of fright
Waiting to resurrect itself every club opening and black movie premiere night...

NIGGER!!!
NIGGER!!!
NIGGER!!!
(Excert from "Night of the living dazed" by JCJ2)

It's been about a year or so since the NAACP public and ceremoniously "buried" the "N-word"
. I remember it like it was just yesterday. That old ass redneck, Amos, had openned his mouth and it was then that everyone found out where exactly Pandora's box had been all along. Muh sukkas were freaking out. Folks were pretty much split down the middle. Black folks that considerred themselves conscious were hardcore for the words abolishment and the opposite end was like "Nigga what?"...and white folks either were against it because they ae villified for saying it or just didn't care either way.

I found myself somewhere along the middle. I'm aware enough to know why someone would want to do away with the word. I'm also aware enough to know that a word is just a word. My original stance was to just stride the line...but like I said muhsukkas were freaking out. And the majority of the ones around me were the anti-abolishers. So I took the side of the abolishers.

Jay = the rebel

I even promised myself that I wouldn't use the word.

Maaaaan.... I held up longer the last time I vowed to stop masterbating. I think I may even say Nigga MORE than before. It's disgraceful. Its weird actually, because I'm good when I write, but when I speak it's like I'm Colonel Stinkmeaner (c) The Boondocks...or some shit. Like what the hell happened? How did it's burial make me end up using it more than ever? Did I low-key not wanna let go?

5 comments:

  1. haha why was i watching the episode of the boondocks where riley was called a N****, when i was reading this...i think the more attention you bring to things...the more they remain. a reason why i wouldn't want to go to an Anti-war rally but i would go to a peace rally.

    but i mean if you wanted to stop you could...maybe you just aint really dead set on stopping, you gotta have a better reason than just to be a rebel.

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  2. That's good point (The attention comment). I think Mother Theresa and John Lennon had the same stance. From that "you attract what you put out" school of thought.

    Yeah, I'm sure I could stop if I really wanted to.

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  3. I wish blogger had a kudos section because I didn't really have a real comment but I did want to say kudos for writing this. The "N" word...so much controversy behind it and so many varying opinions...

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  4. Thanks for the kudo comment..I appreciate it

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  5. its funny you say this... at my university we organized a black student union meeting about being the black community's homophobia and it seemed after the meeting more people were saying "no homo" than they were before

    i really think it might be some weird phenomenon going on to an extent...sometimes its more alluring to say what isn't politically correct

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