Saturday, February 28, 2009

Epic Fail goes to...

Slum Dog Millionaire. I know your like what the hell is he talking about? They just won 8 Oscars! Well 2 of the kids in the movie ACTUALLY STILL LIVE IN THE SLUMS.

Like yeah kids we know we just sold millions of dollars in movie tickets as well as won a gang of accolades but ummm yeah...Good looking out on the GENUINE experience that helped out our movie.... We're gonna send y'all lil asses back with bragging rights...hopefully that'll help with ya ghetto problems....PEACE OOOOOUT.....smh.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

The wackness

I dunno if it's like this everywhere, but in the metro Detroit Area every Sunday at church hours they play gospel music on the majority of Black/urban radio stations. That's fine and dandy. Get ya praise on by all means. What I can't stand is that in the world of Hip Hop one of the biggest long standing rules is biters are frowned upon...and damn near every Sunday if you're listening to a hip hop station you'll hear a popular hip hop song completely reversed for gospel. That's wack as hell. I'll even put asside the fact that the "religious right" has been going hard on hip hop for the past few years, because obviously these particular folks don't think its that bad if they are using it as a tool to get their message across...but come on man...Come correct. Be original.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

"The Era of Swagger"

We are now living in the era of swagger.
Yep I said it.
It is probably the most commonly used word today

I use it.
You have used it.
Your favorite rapper uses it.
Newscasters use it to describe the current president.
Some of your friends misuse it...
They don't know whether its a noun, verb, or adjective(It's actually all of those things).
They just want you to use it when talking about them.

This is an amazing time we are living in people.
Take advantage.
SWAGGER IS IN STYLE.

Swagger (adj.) - marked by elegance or showiness
Swagger (noun) -
a self-confident outlook
swagger (intransitive verb) -
to walk with an air of overbearing self-confidence

We now live in a time where it is "in-style" to posses, look, feel, and move with an air of confidence.

So allow me to say for the first time in my life.
If there was ever a time to be a follower.
Now is that time.
Follow in that shit.
All that bullshit you used to think about yourself is "so last year".
So leave that stale shit behind in 08.
All that shit you said you couldn't do let that shit chill with the "Superman Dance", Those Bape styled overprint hoodies, and the first generation i-phone.
It's a new day.
And no it's not cool to your own thing.
Not this time.
Not with this.
So be there.
Or you might never be at all.
L 7 Weenie!!!

**Not a poem...it just came out looking like that.

Battle Royale...extra cheese no onions

Well the case is still coming together on what exactly happened the night Chris Brown and Rhianna made their presence felt within the world of domestic violence. All we know now is that yes, CB did infact crump all over Ri Ri's pretty face.

Now there have been many theories that have come forth. The only one that I've heard tat I thought worthy of an ass whuppin was the story that Ri Ri cheated on him, and a bi-product of that incident, gave Chris herpes(aka the gift that keeps on giving...yuck). But what I've been finding out is that some chicks don't even think thats worthy of an ass whuppin.

Word?

Now before anybody gets it twisted. I'm no advocate of beating up a woman...or anybody for that reason without probable cause...

2 causes worthy of an ass whuppin...

1. Self defense - You come at me trying to inflict damage...I will not only defend my safety, but make sure you think more than twice about trying me again. Hopefully if you're a chick, I can diffuse the situation without it getting that far...but every situation is different. Some chicks are strong


Some chicks can scrap.



Some chicks fight dirty.


Some chicks carry weapons....


etc...etc...etc...You can't just expect automatically, that if a chick jumps on a dude (trying to inflict damage or even worse...death) he can treat her like a kid and be like "Go'n somewhere".



2. Burning folks (std's) - Now I don't think you should peel them off, but definitely a 2 piece is in order. Thing is, I know for a fact that no one would even have a problem if the case was reversed. Women would be all on blog sites and shit talking about Ri Ri was good for not shooting Chris' ass. Straight up, your already in the wrong for cheating on them...which I think is dirty but not worthy of an ass whuppin...If that's the only offense, then the victim should just move on. But if the victim of infidelity gets burnt as a result of some dumb shit... I firmly believe... either somebody should get laid out (if it offends you that much I'll get my female homeys to do it...but somebodies eating pavement)or somebody has to do some jail time (where hopefully they'll gt their asses whupped repeatedly) because that shit is foul.

I would post a link to some nasty ass pic so ya'll can truly see where I'm coming from...but I'll save ya and just say go type herpes in google images.

What warrants an ass whuppin in your book???

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

...stranger than fiction.

(Source: CBSnews.com)

Authorities say the mysterious white powder that prompted evacuations at the Eagle County sheriff's office last month has been identified as instant pudding. The powder, a parking ticket and a $35 money order were in an envelope that was mailed to the sheriff's office Jan. 13.

The incident prompted an evacuation, and two employees who came into contact with the substance were quarantined until a hazmat team determined the material wasn't toxic.

A report by the Eagle Police Department says infrared sensor equipment was used to identify the substance as Jello-brand instant vanilla pudding.

Police say the Colorado Springs man whose name was on the ticket has been on vacation and officers were only recently able to interview him. They say he had no explanation for the incident, other than to say he is "not a clean person" and that he probably picked up the powder while paying bills on his messy kitchen table.

The agencies involved have concluded there is no reason to continue the investigation.
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Looks like Cosby is up to his old tricks again...smh.



Monday, February 16, 2009

(<-------------->)

I guess some thoughts are better off confined to a journal...lol.

I often wonder does Chris Rock have to go through bullshit with his wife after his comedy routines. If you've never seen a Chris Rock stand up over the past ten or so years...Chris goes hard on marriage. Like on some avalanche shit. He's been quoted as saying that "marriage is boring" and that women are generally single-minded/selfish. He basically vents a lot of taboo shit about relationships that would get any regular dude a first class trip to the dog house. If I were to ever meet dude, that would be the first thing I would ask him. Does he ever have to answer to his wife about the material in his acts or does she let it ride? I mean dude is a millionaire so he may answer to different rules than regular cats.

Anywho...I've said before that the main reason for which I blog is to express myself on my own terms. The problem with that and any action, for that matter, is that there are consequences. Which I personally think sucks...but that's life I guess. I suppose that means I should find (or rather just go back to) another place where I can express EVERYTHING on my own terms.

Back to the drawing board...literally.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

"Gotta hustle smarter than that"

It's a dangerous game getting excited about something around your girl if that something has nothing to do with her. It's like playing Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun. You already know the outcome.

Guy: Man I really had a great time hanging out with the fellas yesterday!
His girl : How come you don't ever take me out with the fellas?



Guy: I was finally able to write a whole poem today!
His girl: How come you don't ever write about me?



Guy : I can't wait to get these paintings done so I can finally get working on putting together an exhibition!
His girl : How come you don't ever paint me?



No matter what the situation you tell her about, from tic tac toe to space travel, she's always gonna wanna steal your joy be apart of it. It's just something dudes have to deal with.

My most recent offense, I made the mistake of getting excited around her about getting back into basketball. Until last week I hadn't had a chance to really get into a game like I wanted. I used to be a basketball court regular. Cats recognized me. I was in shape. My mid range shot was Brita water. Somehow, the past 3 years have made me stray. I've gotten out of shape. My hops/ legs need serious work... I may not be able to boom anymore (**single tear falls). last week though, I found a glimmer of hope. I finally got a chance to hit the rec. I worked out hard in the gym first, then went to the courts to shoot around. At first, as to be expected, my shot was str8 but like a Luke video...But eventually I started to get that old feeling back. My homey ended up hitting the court and we got in two games of one on one. After the second game I thought I was through (I was tired, and my confidence still wasn't built back up),but my homey convinced me to stick around and join him in some games of full court 4 0n 4...Bottom line... I was cash for 4 games straight.

In the middle..."DRAWS!!!"
Mid range..."PANTIES!!!"
Three point..."SPLASH!!!"

It was a lovely experience. I went home smiling from ear to ear. My girl took notice and asked me what was up. And I told her the story...and immediately after in my head I was like "FUCK!!!".


My girl: Why won't you teach me how to shoot?

So today was the day. I went into the rec pretty much dreading it. I'm sure she took notice. We started out just working out and I finished my workout first. So I was able to get into nice shoot around before she even noticed I was gone. I was hitting em pretty steady from jump this time around. I zoned out so tough I didn't even notice her sitting sideline until the ball had bounced her way. I thought to myself "Maybe she forgot." Just as that though entered my mind, a couple went on the opposite end of the court and started a game. Cat's were str8 od'in. Muh sukkas were laughin and giggling and shit. I thought to myself "These muhsukkas are gonna get me in trouble." So I bit the bullet and called my girl over. She was waiting for it. I saw it on her face. So I then told her the basic form of a jump shot and let her do her. After all, that's all you really need. The rest is just a lot of practice. Come to find out though, she has extremely little basketball experience. There were parts of the shoot around that could've made America's Funniest Videos. On top of that she complained constantly and didn't know the concept of "make it take it"...I felt like a str8 up MADE coach.

I won't say it was all bad. Eventually she started hitting shots and stopped complaining as much. That part was pretty cool actually.

So I guess with the outcome some would think that I would be feeling warm and tingly and shit...and the end would somehow justify the nonsense...

It Doesn't...but I'll take 45 minutes of wasted shoot around time over a 45 minute argument any day.



THE END

Friday, February 13, 2009

I'd attend a ballet for this...


This is Misty Copeland, a 26 year old ballerina...That's all the information that Vibe magazine has provided me at this time. Quite frankly, it's all that I feel I need to know about her at the moment. I found out about her when I picked up the most recent issue of Vibe. It had her doing this lil number shown below.

GOT DAAAAAAAAAYUM!!!

Are you kidding me??? That's a sexual playground right there son... Not Disneyland...but Six Flags man!!!*

*That is unless she suffers from fucked up lookin feet, a common ailment among dancers...smh. Yeah they look good in the side pic (up top), but what about her toe game? It could look like she uses those strong ass toes for demolition purposes for all I know... I'm talk straight up Kool-Aid man wall destruction activities...ya dig?

Shedding a single tear

(Reported by TheShoeGame.com)

How much is the Nike Air Yeezy and Kanye’s Louis Vuitton sneakers going to cost? Rumors have been floating around and people have been coming up with their own prices, but according to MTV News and Kanye West, the Air Yeezy’s will be $250-$300 & Louis Vuitton kicks $600-$800. Ouch!
_______________________________________________________________

Damn Ye...You're killing me with these prices homey...and yet... I still want to buy them...smh.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Public Service Announcement

To all rapper, singers, etc...

STOP PUTTING POLICE SIRENS IN YOUR DAMN SONGS, SKITS, ETC. I'm sick and tired of damn near having a heart attack every time your shit comes on...At least warn a brother before you do it...A verbal or written warning will do.

Thank You

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Public sex (gone/done) terribly wrong



I personally don't want to live in a world where a man can't take plastic dolls in the middle of a supermarket parking lot and have sex with them in broad daylight. I'm pretty sure when the French talk about Americans being closed minded about sex this is what they were talking about. I mean sure he didn't have tinted windows...but he was in a car. Cars have served as miniature hotel rooms for people across the world. Sure he could've parked behind a building or something but ummmm... you know how you get hungry after sex. He obviously wanted to save some time and GAS (dude was thinking GREEN son!) on his trip to the market. I just want to let you know, you plastic player, that I get it. So while you in jail and everybody is looking at you like you are out of your damn mind...know that...YOU ARE...lmao.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Go [flacid] For My City




It was one thing for cats to get caught slippin with the losing candidate after the main Dem Vs. Rep elections. But nothing say's "I don't give a fuck about my car" like having candidates that didn't even get past the primaries stuck to the butt of your car. C'mon man. The other day I saw a bumper sticker from a candidate in the green party...Word??? Like when muh sukkas be all on their soap boxes and shit talking about votes not counting. You are the vote that nobody disputes with dude about...SMH

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

I'd like to give a special shout out to...


"That punk ass dog"
You know the one. You'd be walking back to the crib after school. When Fido, the king of the assholes, sniffs your scent out of the air. He figures he has about a good 20 seconds or so til you walk past the gate that holds him captive. So what does he do? He goes and hides. And waits...And waits... And waits til you've just come to the edge of his gate. Then the bastard jumps out in a Jason Voorhies like fashion


and barks at you via megaphone. You damn near shit on yourself.

Actually... you do shit on yourself that first time... But you were close enough to the crib so nobody found out. You burned the evidence. And the following day, you chose another path to the crib that made Fido's job tougher.


Fuck you Fido!!!

Monday, February 2, 2009

THE GREATEST SUPER BOWL COMMERCIAL OF ALL TIMES!!!

Super Bowl Interrupted with Pornographic Material
(Source :www.kvoa.com)

Tucson, Arizona

Updated 8:30a -- Comcast Releases Statement Apologizing to Customers

KVOA-TV is investigating pornographic material viewed during the Super Bowl by some Tucson area Comcast viewers. Just after the last touchdown by the Cardinals, approximately 10 seconds of pornographic material was shown. It appears this material was only viewed by some Comcast customers.

At this time, our internal investigation leads KVOA officials to believe our signal had no interruptions. "When the NBC feed of the Super Bowl was transmitted from KVOA to local cable providers and through over-the-air antennas, there was no pornographic material," states President and General Manager Gary Nielsen. The signal is transmitted from KVOA to Cox Cable via a fiber line. It is sent from Cox to Comcast through another fiber line.

Comcast has released a new statement today:

"We are mortified by last evening's Super Bowl interuption, and deeply apologize to our customers for the inappropriate programming. We are aggressively investigating the situation including the possibility of foul play," said Kelle Maslyn, Comcast Corporate Affairs Manager.

When we contacted Cox last night, we received this statement:

"We have received no evidence that any inappropriate material was broadcast on any of our channels during the Super Bowl. The alleged incident appears to be isolated to the Comcast territory. We will offer our support to all appropriate organizations to help them determine what happened," says Mike Dunne, Cox Director of Media Relations.

KVOA is dismayed and disappointed that some Comcast customers and their families were subjected to this material. Nielsen says, "KVOA will continue to investigate what happened to our clean signal and make sure our viewers get answers."

___________________________________________

Looks like somebody got some free advertising...Not that porn really needs a commercial.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Your reality, my reality both reality

Like a couple months ago, this cat in the world of Facebook had made a comment about a painting that I at the time thought was wack as fuck. I still think it's wack to a certain degree, but I'm working on myself to be more open to others views. I kinda suck in that department.

Recap: Basically, this person had went into a museum and saw a particular piece done by Kehinde Wiley, posted it and said "I guess they're calling anything art now" in the caption. What Kehinde did in the particular painting was he took a Neo-Classical painting done by a famous artist (And I mean famous, like in the way that if you take an art histoy class you have a 90% chance to read about them in the class) and put black charaters in them. Basically saying, that we are just as important as these Kings, emperors, warriors, etc.. Now being an African-American artist, I saw the comment and became infuriated. I thought immediately about years of sitting through art history classes and not seeing any black artists. I thought about sitting through all those classes and seeing no black characters in the paintings. I thought about all the grafitti heads and other inner city artists having to struggle to even get into galleries. So I wasn't trying to hear ANY opposing views after I posted the vent blog. But then my homey dropped this gem on me.

A wise friend once told me that "at a certain point people believe themselves to be so intellectually above things that they find meaning in dumb shit." Art included. Art is quite subjective and the inherent beauty in the concept is that it means something different to everyone. Art to you, as an artist, means something different to the average joe. I think that any position on this subject should be prefaced with "in my opinion" because that's all it truly is at heart. Just like it's offensive to tell someone something they believe is art isn't, the same has to be true of the inverse. You can't tell me what doesn't appeal to me isn't art to me.... Art is always an individual experience and shouldn't be treated as anything else. All art doesn't take skill and we know that... Sometimes it's just about throwing shit at the wall to see what sticks... And i'm a wee bit creative myself so I understand.

So after that, I realized that some cats just arent going to see what you see. Not every one has that education. And even people with that education are not neccesarily going to agree with what you believe. That's life. That's how the world works. And I've come to realization, that unless the idea is dangerous, I gotta let some shit slide.
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I just realized that "dangerous" is a relative term...lol. Damn...uhhh yeah....HEY LOOK OVER THERE!!!

**Runs in other direction